You, Me & Carbs

Last nite he planned the date. Now I know why I will never stop being a domineering, control freak, especially when it comes to deciding how to spend my evening.

First, he wanted Italian. Thanks, alot. Why don't u just manually insert fat where its least flattering on my body? But I thought, What the heck? Eat carbs, drink, be merry. For tomorrow, you die.

Then the most unthinkable thing happened. He wanted to see "You, Me & Dupree." From the instant the movie title came off his lips, a sense of dread rose within me.

So we're in the movie, right. And it is sooooo borrrrring I could scream. The laughs are few and far in between. And that's putting it mildly. Owen Wilson is running around with the stupidest haircut known to man. Matt Damon has no comedic timing; and, that whole dry wit thing he tries to pull off...close, but no cigar. Michael Douglas (he plays Kate's dad) looks old; but, can play a prick better than anyone in the biz. And Kate Hudson has the body of teenage boy. That crap is not sexy. She has no curves, no womanly goodness. I started thinking Maybe my date should've forced carbs onto this rail of a girl.

I want to go back to a day when females in Hollywood looked like women...Audrey Hepburn, Marilyn Monroe, and Jane Mansfield were big-fine compared to these starved-out, pilate'd-out stick figures on the big screen today.

Dear Kate,

Eat carbs, drink, be merry.

Sincerely,

Random Oberservation b.k.a. R.O.R.O.

PS: Your movie sux! But I always like your hair, for whatever its worth.

I really have no desire to rehash the plot of "You, Me..." Just know, it starts slow, but crashes fast. This movie gets a ...